Pained, Disappointed and Disillusioned

“The truest characters of ignorance are vanity, and pride and arrogance.”
Samuel Butler



Arrogance diminishes wisdom”


Arabian proverb









It had been a day of ups and downs. The upside of everything is that Silken had told them this morning that she was carrying twins. She was elated, and if possible, Ba'atar's chest swelled to where his vest could not even contain it. Another up, was that they got to spend some quiet time at the fires together, with very little interruption, and those were moments that she treasured.



Now the downside of things had been her talk earlier with One, and the lesson of who is Tribe. One that she hopes that he understood. When she told Ba'atar of it, the first thing he wanted to know was a typical male reaction, who had won the fight between he and his friend. She brushed that aside and told him of the cause of it, and of her talk with their eldest son. He assured her that he would speak with him too, just to reaffirm what she had told him.



Now, he had been concerned about Tone ever since the race with Noya. And in all honesty, the animal had not performed well, but she had a small idea what might be wrong with her and assured him that she would check on the mare for him.



Her suspicions were confirmed, the mare was with foal. She actually had to laugh to herself about how all the important females in his life seemed to be filled with life. She had rubbed the mare down, talking to her softly, almost as if she were sharing secrets with a friend, and to her, they were friends.



She had been at the clan wagon, seeing to some repairs to tack when Hallie ran up, all upset. It had taken her a cup of tea, and several ihn to get the girl calmed down enough to talk, and she almost wished that she hadn't.



It seems that Tarra has forbid Hallie to continue with her training within the clan. When she pressed Hallie for her reasoning, the girl gave her the most miserable look, and said it was because of the prospect that had returned to train with the clan. The girl then begged her to send the woman away, so that she could continue with her training. As much as it pained her, she told the girl in a very gentle voice, that it was impossible, that Akasha, as Tribe, had a right to train in her chosen clan, and until she did something that was beyond the pale, something that harmed the beasts or the Tribe, she would be allowed to continue her training. Sobbing, Hallie had bolted and ran away, and that probably pained her even more.



It was rare that she became angry, but she was. She had known that Tarra was upset when she had welcomed Akasha back to the fires, as she did, but she considered the young woman a friend, and knew of her problems with her family in the outer wagons that had kept her away, and understood them. There was a time, when the failing health of her own father had pulled her away from the first fires, but when she had returned, she was welcomed back.



She was angry and hurt on many levels. The first being, that it always hurts you when someone that you love and respect does something to taint that respect. That they do something so spiteful that it hurts many who are innocent. By keeping Hallie from the pens, Tarra was inferring that she would allow some harm to come to the girl, which was beyond ridiculous, or that just being in the proximity of someone that Tarra did not care for, would taint her in some way. Now, how do you taint someone that has been raised with strong Tuchuk values, as Tarra claims her children have been?



Standing, she began to pace, truly distraught over the entire situation. She knows that Tarra has a temper, and can be terribly narrow in her vision of things, and she knows of the woman's seeming hate for anyone new to the fires. Why was that? Did she feel threatened in some way? But what pained her, was that in her temper,Tarra had taken aim at Cana, by keeping Hallie away, and had ended up wounding her own daughter. She almost begins to regret the words of praise that she had spoken just a few days ago to Tarra, about admiring how she did not stand in the way of her children and their chosen clan. Well, bosk dung. She had just thrown a horribly big obstacle in the path of her daughter, and to what end?



A sharp pain passes through her middle, and she stops, and begins to inhale and exhale to try and relax. It felt like a quiva going through her. Getting this overwrought was not good for her, or for the babies.



She was at a loss as to what to do, and all she could hope for now, was that in a few days, the woman's pique would come to an end, and she would reconsider allowing Hallie to follow her dreams. If not, it would be a sad thing, indeed.