She remembered back to a time when she had Another One on her hip, and was already beginning to show with Also, and the Salt Man had quipped that all a man had to do was take his pants off in her vicinity and she was pregnant. It wasn't quite that bad, but some would say close to it.

There is a thing about women, they understand their bodies more than men do, or at the very least, they understand something's about them. Some women claim to know the exact moment of conception, which if they wished to believe that, who was she to argue with them? She had a fairly good idea when this new baby that she carried was conceived. It has to do with a night of unbridled passion, the stars above, the earth below, and the two of them in a world of their own between the two.

There were going to be those that will tsk, tsk and whisper behind her back. Let them. There will be those that will shake their heads in disbelief. Let them. There will be those that will think it is too soon, out of concern for how hard having children can be on a woman's body. She loves them, but she feels fine. The sky has chosen to bless them again with a child and she was happy. But, she was actually thinks that perhaps Ba'atar is the one that is the most thrilled. He already has visions of another son to carry on after him. The skies would never, ever pull a cruel trick of sending him a daughter.

She has her reservations, but he just has this way of making them go away. In his mind, the sky loves him, and because the sky loves him, she will not allow anything bad to happen to him, and by virtue of that……nothing will happen to her either. How is that for logic?

And they say that women are complicated.

Changes

Eventually she had fallen asleep, curled up next to Ba'atar, until the early ahn of the morning. Dawn had not even began to lighten the sky when she woke up with that ache in her breasts that told her it was time to feed Also. It was a daily ritual of sorts. She ran to the wagon behind them, gathered him up from his furs, brought him back so that he could take his fill, and we would normally fall back to sleep for another precious ahn or so.


Slipping into an old tunic of Ba'atars' she stepped between the flaps onto the platform, prepared to make her short jog to the second wagon, when she was startled by something new and froze into a rather awkward position. There were two many scarred warriors standing by the platform, one on each side, and both of them had turned their heads to look at her, one even fighting the slightest shadow of a grin. In the tunic, she felt absolutely naked and one hand moved to the neck of the tunic, while the other moved to her unbraided hair. She verily stumbled back inside the flaps, sat down on the foot of the sleeping platform and tried to regain her breath and think.


Finally, she realized who and what they were. They were the Ubar's Guardsmen. Sitting there, she had memories of Fonce grumbling about them from time to time, and Kam telling him that they were necessary. Standing up, she went to the front flaps and eased them open so that she could see. In the darkness she could make out three more shapes. One sitting in the box of the wagon, then two more at posts on either side of the wagon box. Shaking her head, she drew back, closed the flaps and looked to Ba'atar who was still sleeping.


Quickly she braided her hair, dressed and stepped out onto the platform. Both men nodded to her as she walked lightly down the steps, but neither of them said anything. Turning to walk along the side of the wagon, she cleared her throat so that the one at the front of the wagon would not think she was sneaking up on him. His reflexes were quick. He turned, lance in hand, and seeing who she was nodded. Stepping past him, she realized that there were also guards around the wagon where her sons were sleeping, which gave her a bit of comfort in an odd way. Nodding to the guards there, she stepped up inside drew Also from his furs and made her way back to her wagon.


Sitting there in the darkness, letting her son nurse, she listened again to the strong, steady breathing of her mate, and the impact of how their lives had changed came to her full force. In a way, Ba'atar was no longer her mate, he was the leader of their people and many things would change. Those night rides to make love under the stars were not something they could do safely any more. Even the quiet times around their own wagons were probably going to be few and far between. There would always be someone there in need to the Ubars' ear and counsel.


Yes, their lives had changed, but if their people prospered and grew strong under his leadership, it would be worth the sacrifices it took.

Ba'atar Steps Up

She had lay awake long into the night listening to the steady breathing of the man who lay beside her, staring up at that small patch of stars that she could see through the vent in the top of their wagon. A multitude of emotions flooded through her. All she had to do was turn her head slightly and look at the strong profile of her sleeping mate, and pride swelled within her breast to the point she thought she would burst open.


She often wished that more people knew the man that she did. Yes, he was arrogant, a man with strong convictions and opinions, but what man wasn't? They needed to know the man that loved. He loved the bosk, the skies, his people, their traditions and values and he loved her and their sons.


She has seen him offer prayers to the skies over the birth of a calf, and she had seen him hold her newborn sons up, tears of joy in his eyes as he offered them to the blessings of the skies, vowing to guide their lives in a manner that would bring only honor to the sky and their people. She probably knew better than anyone his love for the land, the skies and his people. They had talked about it at length, even before they were mated. In fact, it was one of the things that drew her to him.


She was proud of him, and proud to be his woman. Did that mean she did not get angry with him. No. She was human after all, and there were things about him that irritated her from time to time. But they were things that could be resolved. He was not perfect, but right now, she could think of no one else that had the visions that Ba'atar had for his people. Visions that would help the tribe to grow and become stronger. Visions that would be built on the traditions of their past, but that also allowed for looking towards their future.


And where he led their people, she would be there with him, supporting him each step of that trail. That was her job, to love him, support him, to raise their sons, and to listen to him when he had need to talk. And to sometimes just be there when he needed a quiet moment. That is no different than any woman would do for the man she loved so deeply.

A Long Day

She had been up long before the first rays of day had began to creep along the land. Also One had been fed, rocked back to sleep and left under the watchful eyes of her girls. In the gray dawn, she had made her way to the kaiila pens and began to work. Her mind and her hands were kept busy by the situation there.


The wounded beasts had been put into segregation pens, and the mortally wounded ones separated even from them. These were the ones that she saw to first. There were three of them that were beyond their help, and to her this was heart wrenching. One was already down, unable to stand, too weak from loss of blood. It was kinder to have one of the men to drive a lance through his heart, than to let him suffer the pain and bleed to death. The two others were nearly as bad, and they made quick work of them so they did not have to suffer needlessly. She could not help herself, she cried at the loss and the waste. Hallie had stood aside, watching and it was quite evident to her that the young woman was effected more than some realized.


As the carcasses were lifted onto a wagon, Hallie had ventured to ask what became of them now. She explained to here that they would be taken away from the camp and burned. Hallie had looked to her in confusion…….a pyre, for the beast. Nodding, she went on to explain, that there would be a pyre of sorts, but for entirely different reasons. If just taken out and dumped, they would present a larger problem, including wild sleens, the smell of decay and the contamination that might seep into the ground, or the water as they rotted. So the burning of the carcasses was a matter of safety, more than one of respect.



The rest of the day was spent in tending to the wounds of the ones that would live. Many a time during the day, she cursed under her breath, the men that had been foolish enough to get themselves into a situation that had caused so much destruction.


The horns of the tabuk are as dangerous as any lance weilded by the hand of a warrior. In fact, they may be more dangerous, because they are a natural appendage to the tabuk, where the lance of a warrior is something foreign that he must learn. There were a great many gashes and puncture wounds that needed to be tended too. Hallie worked by her side all that long day, learning which herbs were used to clean wounds, which ones were sprinkled into them to help staunch the flow of blood and to aid the healing process. She also learned the art of stitching flesh and muscle together in a situation that was not exactly optimal.


One of the first things that had to take place before you began to treat a wounded kaiila, is that his fangs and claws have to be taken out of the equation. Beasts were caught, tethered to the fence, and their mightily jaws tied tightly with strips of leather. Even after all of this, some still put up a valiant struggle. Often it took several men to hold the beast so that it could be administered to.


And the day was not without incident. One man had to be sent to the healers wagons due to the snapping jaws of a particularly stubborn kaiila that did not understand they were only trying to help. She herself ended up with a ripped tunic and a long scratch along her shoulder. But finally, they were finished and she sat down on the steps of the clan wagon, drinking from a bota of water, talking to Hallie about the events of the day. She was quite proud of the young woman. She had worked hard, asked good questions, and her hands were quick, deft.


After resting, she slid off the platform and they made one more check on the animals, then she told Hallie to follow her, that they still had work to do. The young woman looked confused, but did not question, just followed.

Rook had spent his day, asking questions, finding out which families had been affected by the incident, which one's would not have mates to hunt for a time due to injuries, and who needed who. He had then gone to Leah with the information, and she and the slaves had worked all day on bundles of meats, breads and sweets. So many times, Cana had done this same thing for the woman, she had felt this was an opportunity to help pay back some of what she had received in the past.

Leah, Cana and Hallie worked well into the evening hours to visit the wagons of those that had been injured, delivering food that would help to tide them over for a few days, and leaving with the promise that they would be checking back on them as long as there was need.

Weary, they walked back to that circle of the first wagons, and Hallie finally spoke, wanting to know why they had taken food to the others. Cana explained to her quietly.......because, that is what we of the first wagons do. We try to see to the needs of everyone. That each and every person in the harigga was family, and family took care of family. It was just the nature of things.

It was Tuchuk.

And Odd Night.

She sat thinking about the evening at the fire. For the most part, it had been quite pleasant. Ba'atar had been in a rather "playful" mood, and was showing her exactly how much he had missed her during the day. It was a lot.


She was not all that sure if she welcomed the invasion of their space by the slave, or if she was not in a way, glad to see her before things went further. But that is another story.


A noise was heard, and their attentions drawn to a slave that was chained to a wagon, under guard. Ba'atar asked for her to be allowed to serve them, and she was released to do that which slaves do. As she approached, she recognized her as being a slave that had belonged to Jerus before he died, by the name of tanya. In fact, the girl had served around Jerus and Silken's wagons for a long time, caring for the children, helping Silk, along with her duties at Jerus' paga wagons. She had always found the girl to be quite efficient and respectful, and tonight was no different. She was a pleasant creature, and served them with respect.


Ba'atar had questioned her about her abilities, and she told him about taking care of the children, serving at the paga wagons, and about being a dancer. Well, this caught his attention, and he commanded her to dance for them. She did. Now, it was not unusual to walk through the harigga and see a girl dancing for a group of men, in fact it was just a part of life. But, the girl danced beautifully. A dance of need and submission, that affected her on many level. And it affected Ba'atar on the most basic one. And since she was sitting in his lap, she was well aware of his.......interest. When tanya was finished, Ba'atar even mused as to whether or not she could teach his new girl to dance.


It was a beautiful evening, they were relaxed, enjoying the company of the girl, then Shi arrived. From what she could tell, he was not happy to see the girl there. Ba'atar even offered to purchase the girl, but Shi was not interested. The why of it, she does not exactly understand, but after some conversation with the girl, he told her to hug the whipping post and took his whip from his belt.


At this point, Ba'atar sent her to put Also and the other boys to bed, and for that she is thankful. She caught glimpses of the whipping as she quickly herded the two older boys into their wagon, so that they would not see it. They were a bit young for such. She has seen whippings before, but this one seemed excessive. The lash could have been laid to the girl, the point made without trying to injure her. Shi is a fully grown man, quite strong, and he seemed to be trying to wield the whip with all of the strength he had in him.


Now, the knowledge that slaves must be punished occasionally is known. But to her, there is a time and place for it. And the main fires is neither. It would have been a simple thing for him to have taken the girl to those Gold Star wagons, and proceeded with her punishment. Why did he feel compelled to subject all those enjoying the main fires to the beating?


After putting their sons to bed for the night, she returned to the fire in time to see Shi's girl jessa putting ointment on the wounds. Ba'atar pulled her back down into his lap, wrapping his arms around her and they tried to salvage the rest of the evening, but there was a bit of a pall over it all now. Shi left, telling the girl to eat, then she could rest. Wonder how much rest the girl would get?


When they were alone again, Ba'atar rolled her to the furs and was trying to rekindle the fire that had been building before they were interrupted. And just as he started, up walked a very pregnant Silken just to say hello. She did not stay long, and during her short stay, Ba'atar managed to doze off. So much for fire making.


When they were along again, she nudged him awake and teased him a little. But the real tease, was when she stood, walked off towards the wagons then tuned to crook her finger at him. He did not have to be asked twice.


The fire was kindled and burned for most of the night.

Talking to a slave about slaves, women and babies

When she returned to their wagons, she had kasra bring Also to her, and settled down to feed him. He was already grasping and nuzzling at her vest before she could even get it unlaced to expose her breast. When that nipple popped out, he latched onto it and began to nurse. She had to laugh and told kasra that he was hungry. She then asked if Ba'atar had come for his dinner, and the girl lowered her head and mumbled........Yes Mistress.


Turning her gaze to the girl, her brow furrowed as she asked if he was displeased, only to get a shake of the girls head. She then asked what was wrong, and the girl looked up, and said that Master had eaten, then said that he was going to sate other appetites, and nodded towards his personal wagon where the slave was being kept.


She looked down to the baby at her breast and asked if that was supposed to upset her? That quiet little slave looked up with almost a wide-eyed innocence and asked........does it? Her head shook, as she said no, it doesn't. That is his slave, men have slaves, and that is just the nature of men. A look of puzzlement came into the girls eyes, and she spoke freely. So Mistress does not mind if Master has a slave? To which Cana answered.........No, she is a slave.


She could see that the girl was still confused, and told her to speak freely of her thoughts. Slowly, kasra began to explain that there were a lot of women that were not that way, especially in the cities. That most women hated slaves. Again she looked down to those rosebud lips that fed so hungrily at her breast, then looked to the girl and began to speak frankly to her.


"That is because they fear. Not the slave exactly, but the thought of slavery. There is not a woman alive that does not know that she is only a breath and a heartbeat away from slavery. It is a valid fear, but I do not fear that from your Master, because I know that he loves me. I will be honest, I was not always that sure of it, but that time has passed. I know that he loves me, and his having a slave does not bother me."


The girl looked up........even if she is beautiful. Cana laughed. "Even if she is beautiful. Why would I not want him to have the most beautiful slave in camp? I love him enough to want him to have the best." The girl still looked a bit confused, and she had to laugh softly as she changed Also from one breast to the other.


"Girl, you need to understand what I understand. You see, she is a slave, and she will never be anything but a slave. She will not bear his sons, she will not be able to walk by his side through life. She will heel behind him, drop to her knees when he stops, and owe every breath she takes to him. On the other hand, I am his mate. I will have his children and share his life. I can stand with my head held high and say........I am the mate of Ba'atar, warrior of the Tuchuk, clan of the singers, and of this I am very proud. She will never have those things, she will always just be his slave, and when he tires of her, he can give her over to be a camp slave, or slit her throat on his whim. So, why should I be jealous of her, or any other slave?"


Kasra thought on this for a time, then lifted her head and smiled. Also had fallen asleep, so Cana speaks softly. "And this is another thing. Children are something that Ba'atar and I gift each other with. No slave will ever know the joy of seeing him lift his son from her arms, his eyes full of love and pride, his heart almost bursting with joy. That is something that only I will know"

A Kailla for Aamon

She had made dinner for her two oldest sons and Ba'atar. The boys had eaten, but Ba'atar had still been with the herd when she got a message from Aamon that he needed her to look at one of his kaiila. Leaving orders for kasra to make sure Ba'atar had his dinner, and fresh water she had walked to he pens to see what was wrong with Aamon's beast.


There were several gashes on the animal's neck and a rather severe one on its' chest. As she began to clean the wounds Aamon told her that the beast had gotten into a fight with a younger stallion, which was not all that unusual. She noted the affection the man had for the big roan animal. He stood at its' head, calming it as she worked. She could see that the kaiila was getting on in time, and asked Aamon if he had another beast to ride for a few days. He said he did, but not one as good as this one. She asked if he had owned the animal for a long time, and he told her yes, since before Ba'atar was born.


This confirmed what she was seeing, but she did not think this was the time to speak to him of having it put down. She could tell that in his day, the animal had been a magnificent beast, but that day had passed. Cleaning and stitching the wounds, she had taken extra care. When she finished, she stood and told Aamon that she had a few kaiila that he could look at, and if he saw something to his liking, he could use it while his healed.


They spent some time looking over the herd that belonged to basically Ba'atar now, and she pointed out animals, and could recite their bloodlines from memory. He seemed a bit puzzled by this, and she explained to him that she was very careful when she bred kaiila, that she did not breed ones that came from the same family blood, and as a result, they had some of the best kaiila in the tribe.


She whistled low, and a young dun colored stallion lifted its' head and turned to look at them. Crawling through the bars of the fence, she moved to him, placed her fingers in his mane and walked him to the fence. Stopping at the fence, the animal tossed his head, gave an almost regal glance to the warrior stand there. She explained to Aamon that the animal was called simply.......Dust, and that he came from good bloodlines, was three turnings of the season old, and she thought they might make a good match.


Aamon crawled over the fence and came to stand in front of the animal, and basically, there was a stare down between the two, as if there was some sort of silent communication going on. Stepping back, she watched as they did the basic male thing, of who was going to master who. She always found this amusing. In the end, Aamon reached out, grasped the beast by that long silky mane and nodded, and told her that he would borrow this one until his beast was better. She could not help but smile, for they seemed suited to one another. She would try to "delay" his own beast being completely healed until he had time to grow attached to this one, then she would breech the subject of what needed to be down to the elder beast.


Aamon led the animal off to his own holding of kaiila, and she watched as they walked away. There was just such a quiet strength in the elder warrior that she found compelling. His back was so straight, his head held high, with a strength and pride that you only see in a man that truly knows who he is. It suddenly dawned on her that in a way, she was looking at her future. That someday, that the arrogance that the man she adored so would give over to that same pride of self-knowledge and she smiled.

Hallie and the Kaiila Clan

More and more, she had began to see Hallie hanging around the pens watching with great interest, which made her chuckle, as she could remember doing the same thing when she was the young girls age. The day came when she had looked at her and asked "Are you just going to stand and watch, or do you want to help?" That was all it took. From that point on, she under took teaching all she knew, starting with the mares that were heavy with foals. Hallie was taught how to do the first checks on them to see if they were carrying. A great deal of time was spent with Cana standing beside or behind her as she learned how to run her hands over their swollen bodies to judge size, position and the length of pregnancy. It was something that was hard to teach in some ways. She had a hard time explaining it. It was just something that you come to know from en'var of experience and tending to the animals. She was pleased to see that Hallie seemed to have the touch, and learned quickly.


They kept very close attention on the pregnant mares, and moved the ones closest to foaling to special pens. Cana explained with great patience about watching them, making sure that when the foal dropped, that there was some sort of fresh game so it would be able to make its' first kill.


Hallie was good with the animals. She had that gentle voice and way of talking to them that would serve her well should she decide that this was her clan of choosing. She also seemed to have a second sense of that they wanted or needed, which was rare.


People choose a clan for varying reasons. Some, because it was the clan of one of their parents, some because one of their parents guided them into it, and even some that just thought they would be good at it. But, there were the ones, that the clan chose them. It called to them just as surely as the marsh cranes called in the early morning. That is how it had been for Cana. She had stubbornly held to that calling, even through her time of studying at the healers fires. All she wanted to do was work with the kaiila. She saw that same light in Hallie's eyes, and it caused her to smile, and vow to help the young woman all she could.


This day she had shown up with a thong with green beads strung on it almost identical to the one she wore herself, entwined in her braid.. Hallie looked at her oddly and asked what it was. She had motioned to her to come and sit beside her. She carefully tied the beads onto the braid that snaked down Hallie's back, and spoke softly. "If you are going to be of the Kaiila Clan, then you need to wear our colors." She watched as the young girl drew her fingers along the beads, and she was rewarded by the brightest of smiles, and a hug that squeezed her breath from her, and a promise that she would never be disappointed.


Watching Hallie run off to check the mares, she sat there remembering the little girl that was bent upon drowning her new brother, and the cage, and the urt. How far she had come. How beautiful she became each passing season. It was bittersweet in a way. This was no longer a child, but a young woman standing on the brink of the rest of her life. A young woman poised to take her place among her people.


It was a moment where sadness and joy mixed within her. How could Tara stand to see her children grow like this? She wanted to keep her own sons close to her, but she knew that was not the way of life. They grew, they matured, they took mates, they lived and they died. A great crushing pain took her breath away. She hoped that she never had to stand beside the pyre of one of her children. And at that moment, she had great love and respect for Tara, and her strength.


Shaking off such thoughts, she moved to join Hallie in the pen with the mares, and notice the young, unscarred warriors that stood by the fence, admiring the young woman. She moved over to them, and growled.

"Do not even have those thoughts. If her mother, the harsuspex does not kill you, I will."